Today I'm going to cover one of my favorite social observations. Hipsters.There is no one definition of a hipster, but these scarf wearing, dirty hair, tight jeans, mustached freaks travel in packs, often wearing short shorts and slip-on vans. You know the ones I mean. Anything "main stream" is awful. They are above any cultural phenomenons, except for phenomenons of the 80's and early 90's, i.e. neon sunglasses and fanny packs. Please see photo above:
I grew up in Seattle, and now I live in LA. I've observed enough snobby, sour-attitude, wack dressing, holier-than-thou hipsters to last a lifetime. I am no expert, but I'd like to think that because of my surroundings I'm qualified enough to comment on the following observations.
Hipsters DON'T HAVE JOBS. Why is this? What do they do? You can be sure that at any concert on a week night, it is full of care-free Hipsters drinking the night away. You stand next to them checking your watch and thinking, "Damn it! Only 7 hours until I have to get up for work. Am I the only one concerned about this?" After assessing your surroundings you come to the conclusion, yes, you are the only one concerned. Still not convinced? I have more evidence to support this no jobs theory. As someone who was unemployed for 3 months, I would often go to the beach or out running errands, etc. Without fail, I would see Hipsters hand in hand on the boardwalk, having long, leisurely brunches, or simply shopping at Target at 2pm on a Tuesday. What do they do for money!?! They can't all have trust funds, can they? I just can't figure it out.
Hipsters HATE hipsters and constantly talk about this burning hatred. If you ever want to truly hurt a hipster deep down, call them a hipster to their face. That's the most offensive thing you could say. What I don't understand is how they can tell which hipsters are acceptable and which aren't? Is it a bandanna color, or better yet, a sunglasses color? I just can't figure that out either. They all look pretty weird to me.
Hipsters are only friends with other Hipsters. But, in a crazy turn of events, as I just mentioned before, hipsters hate other hipsters. Therefore, I think on some level, all hipsters hate their friends.
Confused? I am. Hipsters sure are a confusing social group. Do you think we can call them a social group since none of them identify with this "group"? It is such a clear cut group from the outside, yet so complex on the inside. It's a group where all members are embarrassed of membership, yet their neon clothes scream, "I AM HIPSTER, HEAR ME ROAR!" So, a message to all the hipsters out there. If you're going to go there, go there. Just admit it, you're a hipster. That's fine by us. We'd rather you just be honest with us, and more importantly, yourself. You didn't come up with that wack ass outfit on your own, you saw some other hipster wearing it and you thought it looked cool. That's fine. Own it, brother!
*For the record, I do not hate hipsters. I simply do not understand their ways. Please comment to shed light on my misunderstandings.
